Made it through another day. YAY!

Today was pretty good - but I am sore and tired. Went on the same hike I went on on Monday - so that was good to know what the route was and what to expect. Then  I had two pool classes - who thought the pool could be so much exercise. Then on to a toning class in a park, which was really nice to be outside in nature looking at trees, and beautiful blue skies with floating white clouds. Then the dreaded treading class - five minutes as hard as you can go then five minute recovery, then four minutes as hard as you can  go and then four minute recovery, all the way down to one minute. I actually ran - which is big for me. I think I have ran a little each day I have been here - must be the bootcamp before I came here.

After dinner tonight the producers of the Biggest Loser came in to answer questions. It was pretty intersesting. Also, the contestants from season 12 were working out right near where we were doing our outdoor workout - I could see the crew setting up for the filming. And, I also saw a boxing rink - probably not supposed to say that - but I wonder what that means. Hmmmm.....boxing contestants??? Who knows!

Tomorrow is the beach hike to Doheny Beach - that should be fun and challenging at the same time. I am looking forward to that hike.  I am pooped so I am going to take a shower and read a little and hit the sack before another challenging, yet exciting day tomorrow. I can't wait to see how much I have lost on Sunday!

Backbone hike today....

Today we went on a hike called Backbone - it should be called back breaker! LOL! It was pretty darn tough - a huge hill to start and then up and and down a winding trail - beautiful view on the hike though. So, that made it nice. I am getting in the swing of it here now - and I am leaving in three days - that is good and bad I guess. I sort of wish I was staying longer so I could loose more weight, but I am also glad that I will be going home. This time I am confident that I will be able to incorporate what I have learned. Tonight there was a lecture on Inuitive Eating - yes eating when your body tells you too. What a concept. LOL!  They mentioned a book that I am going to read on the subject - so more on that later.

One of the contestants from the Biggest Loser - Darius - is here now doing some promotion for the resort. He looks pretty darn good - I remember him from the show. And, they will be filming part of season 12 here while we are here. That should be interesting, but we may not see to much of the contestants as I think they will be filming while we are out in nature enjoying our hikes.

Tomorrow is day four. I am far less tired than I was the last time I was in Utah - not sure why - could be the altitude difference or perhaps the fact I have snuck in a couple of half hour naps here. LOL! It really helps that little bit of a nap - for me anyway.  More tomorrow.

Great Malibu Creek Hike

Today we went on a hike to Malibu Creek - it was really fun, but very challenging for me. We saw several people riding horses - I think we were on a horse trail - evidenced by the giant dolups of goo. LOL! We climbed up a pretty steep hill - it was steep to me anyway and meandered through the trees to the top and then back down and through a open clearing. Malibu is pretty cool! I never knew and I have lived in California my whole life - who knew!!! The rest of the day was good too - I did sneak away for a nap after lunch and missed one of the lectures. I had listened to it in Utah - so I think I am good on that. After the hike was five more hours of exercise classes - thank goodness on of them of was stretch. I never knew I had so many muscles that needed to be stretched. Yoga has got to be on my list when I get home. This time this is really sinking in - I know now what I need to do at home. No more fooling myself with crazy diets, etc. It is basic calories in - calories out. Of course the food needs to be nutritious food, not crap.

 One of the first things I am going to do when I get home is clean of the refrigerator and pantry - yes, Steve I am again. But, this time it is going to stay free of the junk food that seems to creep in after I clean it out. I have no one but myself to blame for that since I do 99.9 percent of the grocery shopping. It has to be cleared of junk so I have no excuses for eating late night snacks.

Tomorrow will be another hike. One day this week the hike is on the beach in Malibu down some - according to others many, many, many - stairs and then on the sand. As you can see here are some  are some photos of the hike today. Very lovely one of me. LOL!

Working out in a 99 degree gym

Today was officially the hottest day ever in Los Angeles. And, of course we were on a long hike up a big hill this morning  followed by hours of workinig out in the gym and in the pool. The pool was great - the gym not so much. It was 99 degrees in there because the power kept going out. Oh boy was that a workout - circuit training - two minutes of cardio then two minutes of weights for 90 minutes in the hot, hot gym.  But, I figure I must have burned a ton of calories in that heat. It was a great first day - even with the heat. I hear tomorrow will be cooler - I sure hope so.


Here are some pics from the hike and a photo of my new house. Steve doesn't know it yet but we are moving to Malibu! A girl can dream, right? More about my adventure tomorrow.

First day for the third time....

Who knew that parts of Malibu are like the mountains. I am here at the Biggest Loser Resort in Malibu and it is like camping in the mountains - with cute little cabins for our rooms and tons of gorgeous trees towering over the resort. The only reason I know I am not in the mountains - I really don't think I am near the beach either right now - is because it was 106 degrees when I pulled into the parking lot here at the resort. This place looks huge.

The whole place has a rustic feel - with great rustic decor and lodge like buildings. I have had my first meal and am now going to get some rest for the hike in the morning. They say one of the hikes is on the beach - that will be fun! Sand!! Here are some photos of the outside of the the workout areas and the pool. Workouts here I come. Let's see what I say tomorrow. LOL!

Bags are backed and I am ready to go...almost

I am almost done packing for my Malibu experience. I am ready this time. I know what to expect. I know what to bring. I know that I will probably have to deal with blisters and I am ready. I know I will need lots of sunscreen and I am ready. I know that I will need lots of electrolytes and I am ready. And, I am going to release at least 7 pounds. Maybe even 9 pounds. I am going to work really, really hard this week. This time I am not having a feast - wine and a big dinner - before leaving, which should show well on some real weight loss next week. It really seems like something has really clicked in my mind on this whole journey. I know you are probably thinking, "Geez it should have by now. You have been at this for nine months now, Suzanne." But,in my defense I have also had my bad habits for at least 11 years, maybe more. So, nine months to get things really rolling in the right direction isn't really that bad, is it? Obviously, I won't be making my goal of a size eight by my birthday in November, but I will have my mental and physical state right by then and be well on my way to reaching my goal in 2011. These last nine months have been some of the most challenging, exciting, fun and difficult at the same time, but I am really glad that I decided to embark on this journey - and the journey isn't over. The best is yet to come! I am excited and ready for a great week at the Biggest Loser Resort in Malibu. Of course, I will be posting nightly with commentary and photos. So, more tomorrow from Malibu!

1200 calories burned playing golf

Boy do I love golf - its fun, its outside, and it burns a ton of calories and that was even using a cart! It couldn't be because I chase my ball all of the course that I burn so many calorie, or could it? Looks like I walked about 3.5 miles playing golf with a cart. Geeeez! LOL! No seriously - I had a great day playing golf with my good friend Michele, plus I burned all those calories. Yipppeeee! Now tomorrow I finish packing and I am off - to burn a bunch more calories. Soon, very soon you will all see the new and improved Suzy.

Laying low until I go to the resort....

because I know what is in store for me. LOL! Seriously I am pretty much taking the week of exercising except for one workout on Tuesday morning and one game of golf tomorrow. I am exciting to play golf tomorrow -should be great weather and a great time with my friend Michele. Then more packing on Saturday and I am off to sweat some more major pounds off!

Lazy day and a baseball game

I am not sure if it was the weather - gloomy and cloudy - or what, but today I was just so tired and not at all motivated to exercise. So, I didn't! Then tonight we went to an Angel's game - lots of fun! Only three more days until I will be exercising a ton - so I guess I am giving myself and my body a rest?!

Getting ready to go to Malibu

I am getting ready to go to Malibu - back for another week of intense exercise and healthy eating. I think this time is going to be the best because I have been eating way better for the last four weeks for the most part - plus doing boot camp. I am super excited - I just got an emailing saying they may be filming part of The Biggest Loser while I am there. I had to sign a release and everything. That will be interesting if they are there filming. Hmmmmm......not sure how I feel about that! I am going to start to pack tomorrow because I have a pretty busy rest of the week. It shouldn't be too difficult since I pretty much know what to take now - but this time I will have to make sure I have everything I need because I will have no roommate to borrow things from. LOL! I am a little sad about that because was nice to have someone the share with each evening. But, hopefully I will have some time to do some more writing while I am there. I should be experiencing many things sense wise - the taste of the food, the sounds of nature on the hikes, the feeling of my sore muscles (oh no!), the sight of the scenery and the people, the smell of sweat (hahahaha, no really!). I will try to give a much more descriptive narration of the days events this time using my senses. Should be interesting. Also, for my writing class I have to keep a journal - looks like I will be doing a lot of writing next week too. I am starting to get extremely excited! I'll be there in only five more days!

Breathe in. Breath out.

Part of my assignment for my essay writing class - writing using each one of the senses. Today was hearing.

Sitting at the table in the backyard with my eyes closed during a meditation with my Prosperity Princesses, I can hear the rustle of the falling Wisteria leaves floating across the patio. The pinging sound of the wind chimes musically resonates, but my mind won’t cooperate. While a chirping bird and the soft flowing water in the fountain lull me to a pseudo sleep state, my body begins to relax. “Get back to meditating,” I tell myself. Probably not the best tone for one on a higher spiritual path to use. My thoughts wander to things other than getting in touch with the Universe. I find myself listen to all the sounds in the yard. Another leaf lands on the table with a crackling sound, as a bi-plane flies overhead. I wonder where the plane is going. The buzz of the bees busily mine the nectar from the gardenias, combined with the sigh of my sleeping dog; make the perfect scene for a meditation. Or one would think. One of women in the group must be moving her hands around because I can hear the jingling of her bracelet, while I try to focus on my breathing. In and out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Finally I can hear my breath as I deeply breathe in and let go of negative thoughts and emotions settling into the meditation.

No boot camp tomorrow

No boot camp tomorrow -I will be on my own to exercise. I think I am going to do my Euclid walk in the morning.

Happy Birthday to my husband, Steve!!!

We had a very nice day - a movie and dinner at Flemings. I may have gone over on my calories today - but that is okay - it was a CELEBRATION! Love you honey!

Crafting my essay

Today while trying to craft an essay for my writing class -  I realized that this weight loss journey that I have been on for the last 260 days has been about much more than just loosing weight. It has been about growing and learning and stretching my limits and my connections to the world and to myself – spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally and intellectually. I never thought when I decided to write a blog for a year that I would learn so much about the world and myself. I actually never really thought about what in the heck I would write about on a daily basis. But, some how I have managed to write about something – most days anyway! This journey has been full of ups and downs – on the scale and in other ways, joys and sorrows – I have cried and I have laughed, experimentation – I have tried many different types of exercising – some fun and some not so fun, I have read many books about topics such as dieting, spirituality, emotions and goal setting to name a few. I think the most profound thing that I have discovered while in the last months has been a sense of self that I have never had before – a sense of me as a human being. I am the type of person that lives in my mind – always thinking - Why this? How that? What does that mean? – instead of living in my body. That probably sounds a little crazy – but it is true. In the last couple of months I have actually realized that my body is a part of me – not just a non-descript vehicle that takes me from my car to my house to the store to work to the gym and back again.  It is the means with which I experience the world. That sounds crazy too – but also true! So, in other words - I am more often than not living each moment in the the actual moment rather than thinking in my head - makes for a much more enjoyable life!

More boot camp and only ten more days

I am busy going to bootcamp or working out every morning bright and early - its making me a little tired around 3 p.m. though. And, I am counting down the days until I go to Malibu - not sure how I feel about that right now. But, I know it will be good. I have to admitt that the last three weeks have been the most consistent three weeks I have had on my journey - food and exercise wise. I'm thinking a see a fabulous pattern developing. Tomorrow is my workout and then the weekend. Woo Hoo!

"I am the only person who has control over my eating habits. I can always resist something if I choose to." - Louise L. Hay

Great quote - but sometimes easier said than done. But, I must remember that I AM in charge of my eating habits, my emotions and my life, right?

Does it seem like I keep saying....

the same things over and over again? And, having the same epiphanies? And, saying I realize the same things? And, not getting anywhere. Just asking.

Only 13 more days until I do it again

I think I might just be crazy. I will be returning to the Biggest Loser Resort again in only 13 days - this time to the new location in Malibu though. Today I am really wondering what I was smoking or drinking - that must be it - I must have been drinking wine that night. LOL! -when I signed up for four weeks at the resort. This will be week three. The biggest difference is going to be the fact that I have been working out much more for the last three weeks and will continue for the next two, as well. So, hopefully I will be stronger. Today I did my boot camp and my pilates session. Tomorrow I won't be going to my training session because I have to take a test for work at 8 a.m. So, I better get back to studying and get to sleep.

More boot camp tomorrow

Woo Hoo! Actually, I should be saying woo hoo that I had that last two days off. LOL! Anyway, I think this week will be similar to last week exercise wise. Today I didn't do any formal exercise, but cleaned aroung the house and took Cleo for two walks. Oh yes and had a great massage. Today I was very atuned to my body during my massage - usually I zone out and go into a twilight sleep. But, today I was making an effort to feel each muscle being massaged. Maybe that is because each and everyone of my muscles - well probably not everyone one of them, but pretty close - was in a knot. Gee I wonder how that happed. It couldn't be the hard core boot camp, could it? LOL!  I feel much more relaxed now after my massage. A little reading and them some sleep before the week begins.

10 bags....of clothes and shoes for donation

WOW! I ended up giving away ten bags of shoes and clothes to charity today. Well, they are still in my living room - but yes they are going out the door. It was a lot of work cleaning out the closet - but, I think it will be worth it. If I hadn't worn it in a year I tossed it. I might already be having a little bit of remorse - but yes the clothes are leaving my house because they won't or don't fit me! Tomorrow I will reorganize the closet. I was a whirlwind while cleaning so some re-organization is in order. Still no wining! YAY!

No wining tonight

It is Friday night - usually the infamous wine night at my house. But, alas tonight there has been and will be no wining. LOL! I am about ready to get some sleep now though. I think a week of boot camp at o'dark hundred in the morning has worn this girl out. I am pretty sore and feeling oh so tired now. Tonight I had a Silpada Jewelery party at my house with my friend and Silpada representative, Yvette - great jewelery! Check it out online. Let me know if you think you want to get anything. http://mysilpada.com/yvette.alvarado 

Tomorrow I will be tearing apart my closet - probably literally. I haven't cleaned in out in almost two years - should be a lot of things to donate. Night all!

Boot Camp...oh boy!

Yesterday boot camp was so hard - it was literally raining and we were running on a trail in the dark since we started at 5:30 a.m. It was eerie in a way - the misty rain and the static from the high voltage power lines made it scary. Well, not really. Gotta make it sound adventurous, right? Seriously though, except for our group and two pregnant ladies the trail was deserted. If they can get up at 5:30 and walk the trail - I guess I can get up and walk/run it too, right? Then today we did circuits in the park – thank goodness it was at 6:30 today. Then I got a burst of energy and cleaned my entire downstairs and most of my office. I threw away bags of papers and I have several bags of old paperwork to be shredded. Guess I have to buy a new shredder - mine died a couple of weeks ago. I am in a total organizing mood – odd for me. One of the things I want to do is clean out my closet and then donate clothes that are too big – yes too big – or are out of style or whatever, and shoes too. I believe I read somewhere if you haven’t worn it in a year, then toss it. I think that sounds like a weekend project.

‎"I am in the process of positive change. I am unfolding in fulfilling ways. Only good can come to me. I now express health, happiness, prosperity, and peace of mind." - Louise L. Hay

Yesterday's post...well....I sort of forgot to post yesterday. Not sure what that means. That is the first time I actually forgot to post, not was too busy, home to late or whatever. More later...a real post. LOL!

A Zen Woman - the start of my daily meditations

This weather is crazy – first it is so hot and cool – actually I loved the weather today though. This morning I had my training session – tons of lunges. Argh! Tomorrow is boot camp again at 5:30 a.m. Woo Hoo! I am psyching myself up for the alarm going off at 4:30 a.m. - early to bed tonight for me! I am concentrating on the next 20 days before I go back to the resort. I want to be consistent with my eating for these next three weeks – and I am going to do it. I think my new no wining (wine) policy will help me achieve that goal.

I am also going to meditate daily for the next three weeks too. Zen! Yes. That will be me – a Zen woman! I hope!

I thought I should do some research on just how to start this process. Although I have done a few meditations in my life, I realize I’m not really sure what to do now that I am making this part of my daily life. The following are a couple of articles I found online about meditation – that should help me get started and maybe you too.

How to Meditate: 10 Important Tips
From: http://goodlifezen.com

Why meditate? On one level, meditation is a tool. It can help combat stress, fosters physical health, helps with chronic pain, can make you sleep better, feel happier, be more peaceful, as well as be present. But on a deeper level, meditation is a doorway into the unknown. It can help us get a sense of the mystery of who we are.
When you start meditating, you will notice how unruly the mind is. I remember being quite shocked by this! I noticed that my mind was all over the place. Profound thoughts about my past or future jostled with mundane thought clips about what groceries I needed to buy. Some time afterwards I would come too and notice that I had spend 15 minutes running a painful memory over and over. It was like sitting in a crazy cinema!
So, if you’re starting out with meditation, please don’t beat yourself up about your wild mind. It is a natural condition. In time you will learn to work kindly with the barrage of thoughts and you will some clarity and peacefulness.
Here are some simple tips on how to start meditating. Maybe those of you who already practise meditation could please add your comments of what has worked for you..
1. Posture
Whether you sit on a chair or cross-legged on the floor, make sure that your spine is upright with head up. If you are slumped your mind will drift. Mind and body are intertwined. If your body is well-balanced, your mind will also be in balance. To straighten up, imagine that your head is touching the sky.
2. Eyes
Try and keep you eyes open. Open eyes allow you to be more present. Just lower your eyes and let your gaze be sort. If you close your eyes you will be more likely to drift away on thoughts and stories. However, it’s important to do what is comfortable for you. Some people find closing their eyes much more effective. It’s good to experiment and see what feels best for you.
2. Focus
In ordinary consciousness we are hardly ever present. For example, sometimes we drive the car on autopilot while being preoccupied with thoughts. Suddenly we arrive at our destination and don’t remember anything about the drive!
So, meditation is a wonderful way of waking up to our life. Otherwise we miss most of our experiences because we are somewhere else in our mind! Let’s take a look at what focus is. In ordinary life, we tend to equate focus with concentration. That’s like using the mind like a concentrated beam of light. But in meditation, that kind of mind isn’t helpful. It’s too sharp and edgy. To focus in meditation means to pay soft attention to whatever you place in the centre of awareness. I suggest using the breath as a focus. It’s like a natural door that connects ‘inside’ and ‘outside’. Zen Master Toni Packer says:
Attention comes from nowhere. It has no cause. It belongs to no one
3. The breath
Paying attention to the breath is a great way to anchor yourself in the present moment.
Notice your breath streaming in and out. There’s no need to regulate the breath – just let it be natural.
4. Counting you breath
If you are having difficulties settling, you can try counting the breath – which is an ancient meditation practice. On your outbreath, silently count “one”, then “two”, and up to “four”. Then return to “one”. Whenever you notice your thoughts have strayed far away or you find yourself counting “thirtythree”, simply return to “one”. In this way, “one” is like coming home to the present moment. It’s good to return without a backward glance.
5. Thoughts
When you notice thoughts, gently let them go by returning yous focus to the breath. Don’t try and stop thoughts; this will just make you feel agitated. Imagine that they are unwelcome visitors at your door: acknowledge their presence and politely ask them to leave. Then shine the soft light of your attention on your breath.
6. Emotions
It’s difficult to settle into meditation if you are struggling with strong emotions. This is because some emotions tend to breed stories in the mind. Especially anger, shame and fear create stories that repeat over and over in the mind. Anger and shame make us keep looking at past events of the past. Fear looks at the future with stories that start with, “What if…”
The way to deal with strong emotions in meditation is to focus on the body feelings that accompany the emotion. For example, this could be the tight band of fear around the chest or the hot roiling of anger in the belly. Let go of the stories and refocus on your body. In this way you are honouring your emotions but not becoming entangled in stories.
7. Silence
Silence is healing. I know that there are is a lot of ‘meditation music’ around, but nothing beats simple silence. Otherwise the music or sounds on the tape just drown out the chatter in your mind. When we sit in silence we actually get to experience what our mind is doing. There is steadiness and calmness that comes from sitting in silence. In time outer and inner silence meet and you come to rest in the moment.
8. Length
Start with 10 minutes and only sit longer if you feel that that is too short. Don’t force yourself to meditate longer if you are not ready to do that. In time you might like to extend your meditation to 25 minutes. That’s a length that allows you to settle your mind without causing too much stress on your body. Most importantly, shrug off any ‘shoulds’. Some people enjoy sitting for an hour at a time. Others find that they can’t sit longer than 10 minutes. Do what feels right for you!
9. Place
It’s lovely to create a special place to sit. You can even make a shrine or an altar that you can face when you sit in meditation. You might like to place a candle on your altar and objects that have meaning to you. It’s lovely to find objects for your altar as you walk. Maybe you find stones, or seashells, or flowers that speak to you.
10. Enjoyment
Most of all it’s important to enjoy meditation. You might like to try sitting with a hint of a smile. Be kind to yourself. Start sitting just a little each day. It’s helpful to establish a daily habit.

How To Do Zen Meditation
From: www.buzzle.com/articles/how-to-do-zen-meditation.html
Two simple exercises showing you how to start meditating.

If you are interested in strengthening your focus, increasing your discipline and gaining peace of mind then you will greatly benefit from some kind of meditation. In this article you will be guided through a simple zen meditation exercise.

People are usually unaware that they they are often completely identified with their thoughts. This means that they don't make a distinction between who they are and thoughts they are having at any particular moment. For example, they might be stuck in a traffic jam and get really angry at the people behind them that are beeping their horns. In this moment they don't realize that the angry feeling is actually something that they are creating in themselves and is something they can choose not to create.

The problem with not being aware of how consumed we are by the thoughts we are having is that first of all that we can have be having very negative thoughts without even realizing it, which of course has a big negative effect on our life. Secondly we might be missing a lot of what is going on in the current moment simply because we are so consumed by our thoughts.

To start meditating sit down somewhere comfortably, preferably on the floor, perhaps using a cushion. You don't need to sit in any special position, just make sure that you are comfortable and will be able to sit still for at least ten minutes.

Next, close your eyes and start noticing how you are breathing. If you can breathe using your diaphragm without too much effort then do so. This means breathing so that your belly moves in and out. If you need to concentrate to do this then practice this at another time and for now breathe as you normally do.

As you are breathing count each breath in and out. So breathe in and count '1' in your mind. Breathe out, breathe in again and count '2'. Try breathing to the count of 5 without having any other thoughts except the numbers. This is more challenging than it sounds and you will often find thoughts appearing out of no where. Suddenly you'll realize that you've been thinking for the past minute in stead of meditating. Don't be disappointed with yourself when you fall into thought. Just start at the beginning again counting every breath. Just practicing this exercise for 5 minutes a day will give you benefits in terms of a better ability to focus and concentrate.

Another type of meditation you can do is mindfulness meditation. In this exercise you just notice the stream of consciousness that passes through your mind. For example you might experience something like this: 'I'm feeling tired after a long day at work... I wonder what I should cook for dinner later... I must remember to go to the post office tomorrow... my left foot is warm'. Just allow those kinds of thoughts to come and go without judging them.

No more wining or whining

Yes. That is correct - I will not be drinking any wine (or any other alcohol) for the next 60 days until we go to Hawaii on November 4th. Steve and I are both not imbibing for the next two months - starting today! I think this should really help me on the diet and exercise front. Also, there will be no more whining either! LOL! So 60 days of total focus on health and exercise - here I come. Yes. And, in three weeks, I can't believe it is so soon, I will be going back to the Biggest Loser Resort - this time in Malibu. Woo Hoo! Workout bright and early tomorrow - then three early morning boot camp sessions on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday!

Day off

I took a day off of exercise today after my kick butt boot camp, pilates and training session last week. I did go on a bike ride with Makayla and took Cleo for two, yes count 'em two, walks today. It was soooo hot outside - I really worked up a sweat on those outings. I really liked my little bike ride with Makayla. I think I am going to add biking to my list of exercise activities.

Tasty Recipe...and good for you too!

Tonight Makyala is spending the night - so I thought I'd make something she would like. But, I didn't want to go overboard on my calorie intake for the day. So, I tried a new recipe. This recipe is amazing – a great recipe from the book “The Skinnygirl Dish: Easy Recipes for Your Naturally Thin Life.” It is really yummy and it even has vegetables in it! Serve it with a salad and you are set.

Zesty, Cheesy Mac and Cheese

Makes 6 servings
320calories per serving

Bake time: 20 minutes

Ingredients
• 12 ounces whole wheat mini pasta shells (these hold the cheese better than elbows)
• 1 cup soy milk
• 1 cup freshly shredded Parmesan
• 1 cup reduced fat sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
• 1 cup frozen butternut squash, thawed
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon dry mustard
• ½ teaspoon pepper
• ½ teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
• ½ tsp. chili powder or a few dashes of Tabasco sauce
• 2 tablespoons whole wheat bread crumbs
• 2 tablespoons reduced fat Monterey jack cheese, shredded

Preparation
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Boil pasta shells in salted water until slightly firm, according to package directions.
2. In another saucepan, combine the soymilk, Parmesan, cheddar, and butternut squash over medium heat until melted and combined. Turn off the heat. Add salt, mustard, pepper, Worcestershire sauce, and chili powder or Tabasco.
3. Drain the pasta but don’t rinse it. Add it to the cheese sauce (use a large bowl if necessary) and toss to coat the pasta. Taste and add more salt or pepper, according to your taste.
4. Spray a shallow baking pan with cooking spray and put the pasta-cheese mixture in it. Sprinkle with breadcrumbs and Monterey jack cheese. Bake for 15 to 20 minutes.

Running in the park and an epiphany

I guess I am destined to learn how to run - all these people keep making me do it. LOL! Again, running in the park this morning with some push-ups, sit-ups, squats, lunges and a few other assorted moves thrown in for an hour early this morning. I am so glad I just have a "regular" workout tomorrow - I may regret saying that too!

On a more serious note….today while speaking with Kwentin, my counselor, we talked about the importance of setting realistic goals – what a concept. You mean I can’t loose 10 pounds a week for the next nine weeks and be done with it? S%&$T! After learning - not really learning…more like finally realizing - about calories in vs. calories out while I was at the Biggest Loser Resort, I know REALLY KNOW it is only possible to loose about two pounds a week. Unless you are in an unrealistic situation – like on the Biggest Looser television program or at the Biggest Loser Resort. I am FINALLY getting this concept and how I have been on this roller coaster ride of losing and gaining and losing and gaining for the last twenty years – and especially during the last eight months of my Fit by Fifty blogging experience which you have all seen. I had a huge epiphany today – yes I’m a little slow. It will take slow steady progress to reach my goal – which I am now extending until June 10, 2011 by the way. I will still be 50 years old then – so hey it is still “fit by fifty,” right? Anyway, there is no magic pill, exercise, words, emotional release, book, diet, experience or anything that can get one to their desired weight of choice – there is just the journey. The slow and steady journey – that is! I feel like I have experienced a lot in the last 245 days – can you believe it has been that long? I have learned a lot too. I know the next 280 days will bring the same – more personal, spiritual, and emotional growth. So, for the next nine months watch me birth a new baby – ME! This is very symbolic if you know anything at all about my struggles with not having children of my own. So, I think it is quite fitting that the new ME will take nine months to be formed – just like a new baby. It’s going to be fun – and it’s going to be a celebration when it happens!

Day two of Boot Camp...OMG

Okay... 5:30 is very early. That is all I can say. It was dark outside. But, I ran... and I mean ran...well...again walk/ran. And did way too many squats and lunges. Today I could barely sit in a chair without crying...and my a&%*%*%*ss is killing me. So, again I go tomorrow at 6:30 this time - thank goodness. I sure am experiencing all kinds of exercise - after my year of blogging I should be able to comment on the benefits and drawbacks to almost every exercise in the world. LOL! No really - it will be close. I think I need to expand my experiences so I can comment on more types of fitness exercises. Sound good?